Sweetness Amidst The Unimaginable

My 7 year old grand-daughter, Amelia has a best friend who was recently diagnosed with a brain tumor. I have no inside information regarding this little girls’ treatment or prognosis, other than the fact that she’s already endured brain surgery and subsequent treatments. This family has been thrown in to an alternate reality where gymnastic classes have been overridden by hospital visits and medical specialist consultations. Their family calendar has been hijacked by doctor’s appointments, intentional home care, and a quest to figure out how to navigate this unimaginable heartache. One day life was ordinary, and the next day this family was thrust onto a path of tornado-like turbulence and an aching world of unchartered territory.

As you can imagine, the community of support for this little girl’s family has been swift and sure. Prayer chains stretch far beyond this family’s Indiana community. I’m certain meals have been delivered, school requirements have been tweaked so that academic expectations remain gentle during this unsettling time.

Recently, when I asked Amelia how her friend was doing, she told me she recently had a play date. Like in usual fashion, the other mom picked Amelia up from school and together, they all went to the ice cream store. Then, home to the friend’s house for Barbie play, games and simple 7 year old togetherness. In fact, when Amelia recounted her time with her friend, her voice betrayed nothing more than what you would expect after 7 year old best friends spend time together; giggles, chatty-ness, and a sense of mundane in the most fun way.

I was thinking about my conversation with Amelia. In the hearts of so many who know the details of Amelia’s friend’s condition and prognosis, the bird’s eye view must be unimaginable and full of indescribable angst. So much information, so much unknown, and so much dedication to keep their little world turning fall beneath such a huge and uninvited burden. Many of us know that moment when we are catapulted to a new reality never again to return to the old definition of normal, and my heart breaks for this young family. Yet, Amelia, along with her classmates and peers, are providing a bubble or sorts in her friend’s little world where childhood innocence and joy exude normalcy despite painful extraordinary.

I imagine the mom of Amelia’s friend. Amidst her cluttered and worried heart, being able to encapsulate her intense worries by witnessing joy unfold in a simple play date hopefully brought a smile to her face.

Russian novelist, Fyodor Dostoevsky said, “The soul is healed by being with children.” This is so true. Sometimes, life circumstance is overwhelming. The story of this little second grader is almost too painful to take in. Yet, Amelia and her peers are filling the cracks of worry and anguish with ease and fun and giggles. 

I have no idea the outcome for Amelia’s sweet friend. Along with hundreds of others, I’m jumping on their bandwagon of hope and healing from afar. This family has had the rug pulled out from under them. I wonder if there will ever be a time for them that equates to carefree. Nothing, nothing will ever make a brain tumor in a child make sense. Nothing. But what will be the balm of this cruel struggle will be the presence of other children – showing up with familiar love and loyalty for a friend whose bond was born from learning spelling words and mastering the monkey bars.

I hope to hear of many more play dates between Amelia and her friend. In this very difficult time, my guess is such appointments might yield the most healing.